Co-Tenancy: Choosing Housemates in Shared Living
Choosing housemates SIL guide: why compatibility matters, questions to ask providers, trial stays, and your right to choose who you live with.
Who you live with shapes your day more than almost anything else in a shared home. Yet in disability housing, people have too often been placed together simply to fill a vacancy. Choosing housemates for SIL or shared living deserves real care and a real say. This guide explains why compatibility matters, what to ask, and how to protect your right to choose who shares your home.
Why co-tenancy matters so much
What compatibility really means
The risk of matching by vacancy
Questions to ask a provider
The value of trial stays
When a match isn't working
Getting the support of the right people
Frequently asked questions
Can I choose who I live with in SIL?
Yes. A SIL home is your home, and you should have a genuine say in who you share it with. From 2026, registered SIL providers are audited against Practice Standards recognising your right to choose your housemates. Ask any provider how they match people and whether you can meet residents first.
What makes housemates compatible?
Compatibility is about living comfortably together, not being identical. It usually comes down to routines, noise and energy levels, shared values like respect and tidiness, interests and personality, and support needs that can be rostered together sensibly. Meeting people and trialling the home…
Should I do a trial stay before moving in?
Yes, if you can. A trial visit or short overnight stay lets you and potential housemates experience the real rhythm of the home before committing. A confident provider will welcome it, because it protects the whole household. Treat a trial as normal and reasonable, not an imposition.
What if my housemate arrangement isn't working?
Act on it rather than enduring it. Raise concerns with your provider, involve your support coordinator, and if needed explore a different home or arrangement. Ongoing conflict or feeling unsafe are signals to change something. You're not locked in because a first match didn't work out.